M-O-N-E-Y...
I think it's really interesting that I've just turned 37 and I still have to wonder where the next paycheck is going to come from. Most months we're fine, some we aren't. We've made some great financial strides in some areas, and yet, we're still broke most of the time. Which only bothers me because it bothers Sharon. AND because it makes me want to take some form of stupid action like getting a job that I don't really care about. Although, I'm getting better at ignoring that impulse.
The real question on the table now is "What do I want to do?" Unfortunately, most days, the answer is still "I dunno." I'm excited about a bunch of stuff right now. Passionate, even. The creativity is flowing and I'm digging the scene and I don't want some dumb ass job to screw all that up. But on the other hand, I'd like to keep my house.
It's not like the wolf is at the door or anything. It's more like he's lurking near the Hydrangeas or napping in the driveway. We have options. We'll be o.k. It's just that sometimes I have this overwhelming urge to be more than just o.k.
Then I have to lie down until it passes.
posted by Paul Overton @ 9:10 PM
1 comments
1 Comments:
Take solace in the fact that you're not, and are unlikely to be a sellout. Keeping what you love central to your life may not pay the bills, but it feeds the soul.
Personally, I still regret that I ended up relying on my academic/techie/geek "smarts" instead of the arts to put food on the table. I've come to despise much of what I deal with in the tech sector, but I have huge college loans to pay, and now in my 30's, it's a bit late to try my hand at being a successful film scorer or high school choir teacher. So I sit in front of a computer 10-15 hours a day and deal with the nagging question of how I can get my life back on the track of something more meaningful.
Signed,
The unfulfilled geek
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